SoggyCornflakes - Celebrities

Petra Nemcova and Sean Penn were spotted together at Elton John's Oscar after-party, leading celebrity experts (i.e people that have nothing better to do than read celeb news the whole day... fine... me) around the world to go, "What the F***?!" (I could've written WTF, but I wanted to keep it classy.). This is Petra's second high profile romance since her fiance passed away in Bali following a freak tidal wave. The first relationship was with James Blunt which compounded in him cheating on her with a string of less attractive females including Australian actress Tania Xaetta and Hollywood's village bicycle Lindsay Lohan. ... All this does is prove that Petra Nemcova likes ugly rich guys. Which puts me in good standing. Except for the fact that I'm not rich. But I really am ugly. Apart from my pillowy lips and my puppy dog eyes. And my masculine stubble which I keep in an attempt to look like I'm a go getter who doesn't have time to shave. Oh... And my nose... I like my nose. It's straight and free from any nasal residue... Oh Screw it! I can't get Petra Nemcova. I guess I'll just look at myself in the mirror and console myself. There you go! Rawr!