SoggyCornflakes - Celebrities

Paris Hilton has shockingly come out top of a poll conducted to guage the "Most Overexposed Celebrity in America". The poll was conducted by E-Poll Market Research and reported by Forbes. Hilton beat out competition from Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears. The always drunk trio pushed the once famous Pamela Anderson into fourth place. Forbes explains the poll, thus (Using Pamela Anderson as an example),

“Without the acting career she hoped would take off. It’s her tabloid presence care of multiple marriages (and divorces) and provocative ways that continues to open doors for her celebrity,”

Did they even need to make a poll for this? You could've just asked me and I would've given you the answer... as would any person who picks up a newspaper tabloid from time to time. Paris Hilton doesn't even have a career. She was once a shit pornstar with a wonky eye, and now she's not even that. Now she's just a weird looking chick with a wonky eye. Note: Yesterday's post was an April Fool's joke! Ha!... anyone? Hello?!!!... I sometimes think these jokes would work better if people were actually reading my blog.

Pamela Anderson has filed for divorce from former porn "star", Rick Salomon (The guy who had "A night in Paris"... get it?). Anderson cited fraud in the divorce papers, although her representatives are refusing to talk. The AP says,

In court papers filed in Los Angeles on Friday, Anderson asked the court not to award spousal support and to keep her and Salomon's income and property separate. On Monday, Anderson filed a request to have a retired judge handle the annulment proceedings — a common practice in celebrity split-ups as it keeps matters private and out of the court.

I'm shocked. I mean a relationship that started with Pamela Anderson sleeping with an equally STD ridden guy to pay off her gambling debts seemed like a sure thing to me. There's no place for romance in the modern world, is there?

I know! I couldn't believe it either! I'll give you a moment to calm yourself. ... Yes. It's true. Pamela Anderson, the star of Baywatch and VIP, is addicted to the white powder known as cocaine. Jonathon Jaxson (A celebrity blogger... Is this now the most common thing in the world? Every second blog is a freakin' celebrity blog... It makes it tough for us low level blogs to complete... B*stards!) reports a source as saying,

“She knows she is going to die soon, so she continues to party out of control thinking nothing of it. Never does she mention her kids. Her marriage to Rick Solomon, nicknamed by Pam and friends as “Scum,” was something to full-fill her immediate emotional needs. We have all known one another for years and nothing ever sparked between them until recently!” “The 3-4 days a week cocaine binges are insane. There isn’t a day that goes by in the past 4-5 years of knowing her that I have seen Pam sober. She won’t even take care of her health properly and the drugs are only further causing her liver trouble.” “I have witnessed her using several drugs over the past few years. Including: Crystal Meth, Methadone, Ecstasy, Marijuana and her nearly daily drug of choice, Cocaine.” “I hope she gets the message soon before it is too late. I am so worried about her and she won’t listen to a soul.”

... I still can't believe it! I mean... A women who lives in Los Angeles... Who's been married to 2 (3?) B Grade Rockstars and a Z Grade pornstar... Who hangs out with Carmen Electra and Paris Hilton... is addicted to crack? Shocking! If people like her aren't safe... Who is? We might as well just lock ourselves in a little shack in the Sahara to stay away from the evil beast that is cocaine. Note: Seriously though, how is this considered to be an exclusive? I mean... My grandma knows that Pamela Anderson does drugs... And my granny doesn't even have a TV... Or a radio... Or a house... Seriously from now on I should start with well known facts and label them "Exclusives"! I'll start now, "Lindsay Lohan has sex with random people... EXCLUSIVE!". Yay! Second Note: The worst part is... I'm reporting other people's "Exclusives".

Pamela Anderson, the former Baywatch babe and star of a porn flick with then boyfriend Tommy Lee, said on Tom Green's internet talk show that she was an unwitting porno victim. When asked by a fan how to break into the adult film industry. Pam said

"Just marry a rock star. Date a rock star and when they say there's no film in the camera, there really is!"

To be fair to Tommy Lee it can't be that hard to trick Pamela Anderson... She's the archetypal "tootsie pop girl" (You know... the ones... penis is a tootsie pop... blah blah blah). I mean didn't she notice that the camera was following her around all the time? Or did Tommy Lee just say that he sees her better through a peep hole?

Maybe, kinda, that's if she doesn't make a baby of her own.

"Would I be ready to adopt a child? I'm not saying it's impossible. I have my two boys and it would just be so amazing to make one more kid happy in this life. David loves kids, he is very strong and at the same time very tender and I just love it."

David is David Binn, American footballer who she is currently dating. Awww, that is just too sweet. Why can't I find a guy like that? I just have a useless ex-online boyfriend who may or may not be a stalker. By the way, I'm so sorry for the erratic and picture-less posts recently you guys. I'm having some hectic work at campus, so this might carry on for the next month or so, but I will be ubdating every day, except Sunday's because even superwomen like me need a break.