SoggyCornflakes - Celebrities

The more famous brother Own Wilson has reportedly been hospitalised because he tried to commit suicide. Before I go into details, I’d like to say “DUMBASS!!!” I mean, first you’re stupid enough to try and attempt suicide and then you can’t even do it right. If you’d read SoggyCornflakes, you’d know our frequent motto…it’s down the road, not across! Then you wouldn’t be looking stupid, everyone would just be mourning your death and analysing why you could have been so troubled.

The story doing the rounds:

“Owen Wilson has now been transferred from St. John’s to another Los Angeles area hospital. His brothers Andrew and Luke are with him.

“Andrew found him after the suicide attempt and called an ambulance. Both of Owen’s wrists were slashed superficially and Owen had taken an overdose of pills.

“Owen was found with a nearly empty bottle of pills next to him. He was at his house in Santa Monica.”

Superficially? C’mon, stupid sissy. I wonder why he would want to commit suicide though. That’s never the answer…unless you’re stupid, then in that case, go ahead and shoot yourself.

So the guy has his brothers with him and according to another source, his parents as well. Seriously, they didn’t teach us anything in psychology. They told us that men usually use more violent means of killing themselves…though I guess they didn’t take celebrities into account, because they’re like a whole other species.

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Apparently, long-term house guests do have an effects on relationships.

ContactMusic reports:

Movie star LUKE WILSON’s brother Andrew has blamed his sibling in part for ruining his marriage. Andrew claims the actor outstayed his welcome in his home years ago when he was struggling in school - and his wife quickly grew tired of her unwelcome guest. The older Wilson, who co-directed new movie The Wendell Baker Story with brother Luke, recalls, “I was living in Dallas with my wife at the time and Luke was supposed to be going to college in Fort Worth. “One day Luke was asleep on the couch when I came home. The window was open and it was a second story apartment and there was a ladder leaned up against the house and he climbed in the window. “Then my wife came home and she’s like, ‘What’s he doing here?’ I said, ‘Well, that’s my brother Luke.’ And she’s like, ‘How long is he gonna stay?’ “I said as long as he wants because he wasn’t happy in school at the time. He took me literally and stayed quite a while and that contributed to some tension in the marriage.

Dude, get a grip. Your wife broke up with you because your a sad little poof, stop trying to blame it on your brother. When you blame other people for your problems, you aren’t any better than Britney Spears, and how low do you wanna go?

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