SoggyCornflakes - Celebrities

Remember Kurt Cobain? That guy that was considered one of the greatest rock stars in history? Remember his wife? That crazy b*tch that made him kill himself (I know it's not true... but it's my blog... so... nyah nyah)? Yeah... Well she has problems (Kurt Cobain doesn't. He's dead... in case you've been cryogenically frozen for the last 14 years). Well...Courtney Love went to the LAPD this weekend to report a crazy gang of thieves that managed to rack up 188 credit cards, piles of checks and a couple of cars... all in Courtney's name. Except... She's crazy so... TMZ.com reports,

We've confirmed Love did make the trek to the Van Nuys division of the LAPD to make a report last week, but sources tell us they are not taking it seriously, one source adding, "it never happened." We're told mentally, Courtney has been on the rocks. We found out she's been diagnosed with bipolar disorder -- this could explain Courtney's latest blogs which are impossible to decipher.

You know how I knew she was lying? When she said that someone was stealing her identity. I mean... Who wants to go into a bank and say, "I'm Courtney Love"? Even if the thieves did that, the next thing the bank manager would say would be, "You're Courtney Love? The crazy b*tch that messed up Kurt Cobain? Really?" And then the thieves would say, "Never mind" and run out of the bank... I'm like a male Nancy Drew. Without the gay boyfriend.

Kate Moss is alleged to have gotten into a fight with singer Lily Allen, after Allen insulted Moss' close friend Courtney Love. A source told Britain's Daily Star newspaper:

"The trouble started when the pair met at the Groucho. Lily ran up to Kate, but after chatting amiably for a while she brought up the subject of Courtney and a row that had blown up between her and Kelly Osbourne. "She was ticking Courtney off in a light-hearted manner, but you could tell Lily meant it. "Kate certainly got that impression because she leapt to Courtney's defence. Kate's intensely loyal and told Lily that Courtney was a great woman. "Lily begged to differ, but luckily at that point staff noticed tempers were flaring and directed Lily and her friends to a separate lounge on a different floor."

It's great to see such close bonds in the fraternity of "drug addled whores". All you need is Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton and voila! You're set for a night of STD's and vomit.

Only because Lindsay Lohan isn't a proper singer. Coutney Love, who's known for her demure life as a nun wants us to know that Amy Winehouse abuses the most drugs in the music industry. The singer (Amy, not Courtney) is staying at home and waiting to stop puking before she can go out on a another self-destructive binge.

"I've never seen anyone take as much coke as Amy. Even I wasn't that bad."

What is she going on about? Coke is great! I can drink like loads and even when I get full, I just have to burp and I can start drinking all over again. Once I told someone that and they asked me why I never sniffed it...so I tried, but then the ice-cubes got stuck to my nose.

And bill is not a person, it is the money given to pay for services/goods rendered. Damn, those 3 years of business economics really paid off! Anyways, Courtney Love, the hottie that she is, is being sued by a Californian Drug Rehabilitation Centre for an unpaid bill of $181,000. WHAT?!? That’s what you have to be to be cured of drugs? Oh puh-leez, I have better things to spend that money on…like drugs, or a face transplant if I looked like Courtney Love Whatever, her lawyer dude said they’d pay up and satisfy all parties. Phew! What a relief, did you know, I couldn’t sleep at night worrying about Courtney’s drug bill? Seriously.