SoggyCornflakes - Celebrities

Does this have anything to do with Ashley Simpson? Unfortunately not but it would have a whole lot more sense. Singer Pete Wentz went into a depressed phase when his band Fall Out Boy became successful. Yeah, that makes sense. Reminds me of the time I threw myself under a bus when I won the lottery. Why should I enjoy success when I could die? Pete says he was prescribed a cocktail of anti-depressants for his symptoms but instead of a cocktail, he went for the keg of anti-depressants and locked himself into his car.

"I got in my car. I remember I was listening to Jeff Buckley doing Leonard Cohen's 'Hallelujah' and sat there and took a bunch of Adavan in a Best Buy parking lot." "And I called up my manager because at that point I was completely out of my head with Adavan I was talking to him and I was slurring my words so he called my mom and my mom called me and she came and got me and we went to the hospital and then I came home and we realized that we needed to do more than just keep your head above the water…"

And that reminds of the time I tried to drown myself when I got my first paycheck...like you need those in the afterlife, hah!

It seems like today is the day where shocking stories seem to pop up from everywhere. We just need Osama to confirm that he's a lunatic and my day will be complete. Ashlee Simpson, the less prettier sister of Jessica Simpson, did have a nose job confirms her father, manager and on-and-off lover, Papa Joe. Papa Joe tells Us Weekly,

"Girls have their own ideas. Anyway, there was a real problem with her breathing and that was cured."

Yes... I'm sure that it was a problem with her breathing and not because she looked like she had a mini elephant trunk hanging off her face. Yes Indeedy.

Ashlee Simpson, adds another string to her bow. Her bow now contains two strings the first being the obvious "untalented jackass", the second is "jealous wench" The 22-year-old singer reportedly dragged boyfriend, Pete Wentz, away from attractive groupies who approached him for a lasting memento following his performance at Chicago's Hard Rock Hotel last weekend. A spy told the New York Post newspaper:

"When female fans tried to take their pictures with Pete, Ashlee got whiny and dragged him away."

It's Pete Wentz for Pete's sake! No one even knows who he is! They were probably going to ask directions to the bath room or something.

In the most boring, unimaginative way possible. Get down on your knees and tell me you love me. -Roll eyes- Next guy who bends down to propose should get a bullet between the eyes. You're spending your life with this woman, at least let her remember the proposal in a nice way. Yeah, I'm ranting, I know, but it's a slow news day. Ashlee Simpson is getting married, to her boyfriend of a year Pete Wentz. A source says:

"Ashlee wasn't expecting it – it was a total surprise. Pete whipped out a big engagement ring, dropped down on one knee and asked Ashlee to be his bride."

And that's the part where Ashlee whips out a gun and -boom-. No, I'm not encouraging violence...I'm just a bitter, bitter and sad girl.

I had the choice to write between Halle Berry saying that she’ll never marry again and breaking the hearts of most straight guys out there and Charlotte Church saying that she won’t marry her boyfriend and father of her baby Gavin Henson that no one really cares about, but I thought I’d be different and write about a story I missed yesterday (by the way, apologies to everyone who reads this for not updating yesterday…I was kidnapped by aliens and they only brought me back today…did I tell you Venus looks like the back of my closet? Honestly) Oh, back to my story, I will be writing about Ryan Phillippe and his maybe new hook-up Ashley Simpson. Ryan met Ashlee at LA nightclub Les Deux which means See Two, according to my Encarta dictionary…See Two? Is that a guarantee that they’ll get you so hammered that you’ll have double vision by the time you leave? Cool. Basically, it says that Ryan seemed to hit it off with Ashlee; they had a make-out session somewhere after which the two emerged dishevelled. It was then reported that they left separately, but Ryan went to her place where he spent the night. Ryan’s representatives deny the allegations and say that Ryan barely knows Ashlee except for a brief introduction at the club. Who to believe, who to believe? I think I’ll trust the source, because sources are always accurate, or at least that’s what they tell us at varsity, and even if it’s the waitress’s boyfriend’s little brother’s dog who gave the report, you just know that he’s right. Here Doggy, doggy! Nice Doggy.