SoggyCornflakes - Celebrities

WestLife singer Brian McFadden insists that his two year marraige to Atomic Kitten singer Kerry Katona was a sham and they didn't really understand what marraige was beyond the big party and publicity. He says they even spent their wedding night apart and their marraige wouldn't have lasted so long if they hadn't had two kids during their marraige. Now how to make fun of this? There's so many options...like how stupid they were to get married in the worst place, or how stupid they were to put up with each other for two whole years. What are you guys? Gluttons for punishment? If you want punishment, just hear me sing...or talk about how hot I am. I know I get a bit boring at times, but you cant deny the truth! The truth is out there and it's called Tigger!

Christina Aguilera talks about how she and her husband Jordan Bratman keep their marraige alive and happy. She says they surprise each other with balloons and love-notes.

Contactmusic.com quoted her as saying: 'He'll fill my room with balloons and I really won't be expecting it. I'll come into the room and there will be balloons everywhere and a card and my favourite chocolates all around. And I'm always sending cards when I can, just cute little love notes. He always leaves 'Post-Its' by my bed when I wake up in the morning telling me how much he loves me. It might all sound gushy stuff, but it feels good. He is the best.'

That really is sweet! It make me go "Awwwwww" and then run to the bathroom to throw up...yeah, that has nothing to do with how sweet it was, I just had to throw up when I saw the picture of Jordan, so I couldn't put his picture in to save you all the trauma. But girls, please note, this kind of behaviour is only appreciated by boyfriends/husbands...doing that to random people will get you marked as a "stalker" and a court date. I was just trying to be nice!

Why does Harry Potter keep popping up in the news? Why is it haunting me? Why do I keep writing about the cast? Nevermind, I won't even try to answer that. Rubert Grint, the 18-year-old who plays Ron Weasley is reportedly dating Kate Lewis who fronts rock group Bonnie & Clyde, and apparently, it was their love of music that brought them together it NME Awards earlier this month. A source reports that they're happy together, so good for them I guess. Though the idea of a younger guy dating an older girl kinda grosses me out. It's not like it's a few months, but atleast its not a mummy-son difference like Demi and Ashton have. But when you think about it, girls are supposed to mature faster than guys, correct? And guys are supposed to be immature until about the age of 30, right? So Rupert and Kate are basically a 15 year old and a 30 year old in a relationship...gross! If my theory doesn't make any sense to you, than tough, it doesn't make much sense to me either. I just put it in because it's my blog...to paraphrase Mel Gibson "Write your own blog!" (except he said "Make your own movie", but that's about the same thing.)

British Actress Kate Winslet is turning her back on Britain...not because of the horrible weather, warm beer and smelly people, but because she does not get enough privacy for herself and her family. The Evening Echo says:

Winslet explains: "You'd see them (photographers) hiding in the trees and try desperately to ignore them because you don't want your child affected by it. "It's weird and freaky. You just don't want someone you don't know taking a photograph of your small child. It's sick. "It's better in New York. New Yorkers are much more respectful, not just the press but the people."

Ok, so yay for her, now she's going to live in New York. You stupid British people you might have a cool accent, but you threw away your only serious actess who'll get naked at the swipe of a credit card...as in, Kate Winslet will take off her clothes for money...but only in classy movies, I think.

For anyonw who's worrying about the cast of the Harry Potter movies, no worries people, you all can sleep easy as all three of the main actors have pledged their loyalty to the movie, espire reports to the contrary. Daneil Radcliffe (Harry Potter), Rupert Grint (Ron Weasley) and Emma Watson (Hermione Granger) have all signed on to the last two movies and will stay until the end.

"I feel a huge sense of loyalty to the character of Harry and the fans who have supported these films over the years," says Daniel. "I could never let Hermione go, I love her too much and love what playing her has meant to me. I'm excited and honoured to be finishing what I started." says Emma Rupert says he "loved every second of being part of [Harry Potter's] world."

So there's your qoutes, are you happy now? Harry Potter lives!

So there’s hope for all you straight men out there, but I think Halle has her eyes on 31-year-old model boyfriend Gabriel Aubry. 41-year-old Halle says that she thinks she’s ready to have kids “I definitely want children. Very much.”

Halle was reported to have said “I want my kids to realize it’s only through hard work that any success or real joy comes. It’s not about money, it’s the intangible awards, it’s about having integrity and doing what you say you’re going to do.”

Yeah, I totally see this happening to her kids! “Hi, Mastercard? Do you take integrity as payment? What do you mean it isn’t worth anything? Fine, you won’t be getting any more business from me! Good Day!” “Hello, Donna Karen? I loved that new dress you designed for me! So how do you want me to pay for it? Hard work or intangible awards? You don’t accept that! Wow, my mum must’ve been talking rubbish! Bye.” “Hey there, Holiday Inn? Yes, I’m just confirming my booking, cheque or credit card? How about I just do what I want to do? That isn’t acceptable? Fine, be like that!” “Hi, Mastercard? It’s me again, I just wanted to tell you that Halle Berry is my mom…you’re increasing my credit limit? Gee, thanks!” And that will be the life of Halle Berry’s kids, seriously Oh, and a quick return to reality. Halle says that she wanted a kid by the time she was 40 and if she can’t have it naturally, she’ll adopt.

It has been reported that Johnny Depp’s 7-year-old daughter was on the “touch and go” when her kidney’s almost shut down from her contracting E.Coli from scratching against a rusty nail at home. Isn’t E-Coli one of those ultra-contagious and ultra-deadly diseases? Oh wait, that’s Ebola, but they sound the same right? Never realized nails were so rough and tough. I knew they had some prick in them, but damn! They attack 7 year olds and probably old ladies in the street, how gansta is that? I am SO turned on right now.

You know, when I read the headline “Desperate Housewives Star enters Rehab”, I honestly thought it was Teri Hatcher or Eva Longoria. Teri could have turned to alcohol because she finally realised how terrible she looks of screen and wanted to numb the pain, and Eva could have started drinking because she was short…and short people get drunk after one glass, something to do with having so little blood, or such small feet…or some equally plausible theory made by Mr. Dude aka the big white bear that sleeps with me…and I don’t mean sleep like that! Sick perverts! The 28-year old actor, famous for playing gardener John in the hit TV show, has entered himself into a rehab facility to deal with alcohol issues, because he realised he has a problem and wanted to deal with it as soon as possible, after stories emerged that he had spent four consecutive days partying at Hollwood’s Mondrian Hotel. My stories today seem to be drinking related…Alcohol is bad, people! It makes you do things that you normally wouldn’t do…like eat anchovies…or kiss your cousin…or hitting on the guy with the harelip and uni-brow because he’s so damn hot!

I know I sound like I’m enthusiastic about this piece of news, but honestly, I couldn’t give a shit, I have work to do and I have a headache and I’m taking a break to give you all a daily dose of my crap ;-) Vivica was arrested for driving under the influence when she failed a field sobriety test and breathalyser tests indicated that she was over the limit. She was pulled over late Tuesday and was released the next morning. How do you like that, huh Vivica? Did you enjoy your night in jail? Oh man, my head…I swear I wasn’t drinking, but it hurts!!! I want my mummy!

Just a quick story. Britney Spears has left rehab after a month after successfully completing the program, or so they tell us. Yeah right, we have a pool going on about how long before Britney appears in public doing something stupid again. My bet is 2 days, and she’ll be out with Paris Hilton wearing a dress made out of a garbage bag and wearing a turnip for a hat. Britney’s reps will try to brush it away by saying that Brit has become a conservationist and the bag is her way of encouraging people not to pollute…her plan will further be encouraged when people start to throw their empty beer bottles into her dress because she looks so much like a dustbin. And the turnip? That’s what they’re all wearing in Milan, dah’ling!