SoggyCornflakes - Bollywood

It's weird that Shilpa Shetty, known as the star of Phir Milenge and Dus and the promoter of yoga is also doing whisky ads.

Well, I guess a girl who can contort herself into multiple positions is a good selling point for alcohol?

Read more about it here!

And I don't mean she's just talking. Shilpa Shetty was recently at a charity auction in London where things like a date with the British Prime Minister were up for grabs but since not a lot of money was being bid, Shilpa walked onto the stage, took the mike and announced,

"Come on people - this is for charity. The winner will get a kiss from me...But it will be on the cheek. I don't want my effigies burnt again."

That would be in reference to the huge debacle of Richard Gere's kiss when they were both campaigning for AIDS awareness in India and people tried to arrest her for public indecency.

Anyways, the dinner date with Gordon Brown was eventually won with a bid of 12500 pounds and the guy who won got a few kisses from Shilpa, on the cheek.

By the way, do you know that someone paid 25 000 pounds to meet Amitabh Bachchan? Along with a walk-on role in some movie and a trip to India...but the point is, Amitabh Bachchan is worth more than the British PM!

Shilpa Shetty has learned a new skill...kinda. On the sets of her new movie The Man, Shilpa plays an actress (a stunningly difficult role I'm sure) who knows how to play the violin. So Shilpa has decided that since she's such a professional actress, she would get into character by actually learning how the violin is played.

A source reports,

"Shilpa's character in The Man is of an actress. She is playing herself in the film. But her character also has an interesting side. She is a violin expert just like pop sensation Vanessa Mae. Her violin playing shots in the film have been styled like a Vanessa Mae video. The film shows her as a famous public figure with a massive fan following. Shilpa wanted to lend authenticity to her character and decided to learn to play the violin."

Shilpa loves playing the violin, though I wonder where her skill level is, since it's quite a difficult instrument to play, but either way, she's earned the respect of co-star Sunny Deol who's impressed with the work she's putting into the role.

Shilpa herself says,

"I have to play the violin in The Man. And to make it look real, I'm taking actual lessons. Trust me, it's a very difficult job to play the violin. I'm having a tough time. My instructor tells me that it's the most difficult instrument to play and he's quite right!"

-Insert cutting remark here- I've had a long and tiring day.

Shamita Shetty has not made great in-roads into the industry after her debut in Mohobbatein and reminds us that even having a famous sister in the industry does not guarantee a decent or even mediocre career.

Since the actress hasn't been in a proper role since Cash, and all other roles being item songs, Shamita has decided to form a production house and has dragged Shilpa Shetty into it as well, hoping that her siblings charms and good luck will work for her this time.

When asked about it, Shamita says,

“Yes, we are coming out with our own production house probably by next year. It’s still in the planning stage,”

“This is also a reason why you are not seeing much of me on screen. Right now I am concentrating more on my production project.”

Hmm, well good luck to her, hope she can direct and produce better than she can act.

No, she didn't forget it. Or then it would mean she has the same problem as my dad who forgets birthdays all the time, especially mine.

So Shilpa Shetty celebrated her 33rd birthday on Saturday night, even though it was yesterday (Happy Belated Birthday Shilpa!), but the poor gal never even got to blow out the candles.

The day started badly when she flew in to Dubai (where the party was planned) and a crucial bag was lost from her luggage,

"This, let me tell you, is the story of my life,"

"No journey of mine is complete without losing a bag. It could be a hopping flight from Mumbai to Pune. But if I don't lose baggage the journey is incomplete."

The bag contained her party dress and she and sister Shamita started the long trek through Dubai boutiques to find another perfect dress, which she didn't even wear because before the afternoon was over, she had crawled into bed with a high fever. She had gotten it from shooting scenes in artificial rain for her new movie with Sunny Deol.

Shilpa doesn't really care that she had to miss the party however,

"Because I spent the evening with my family. To me there can be no better way to bring in my birthday."

Sweet.

No one make fun of my Punjabi and don't ask how the speech bubble is actually related to the post. My Punjabi is basically restricted to "Twaada naa ki Hai?" and "Thusi kithe rehende ho?" Which mean 'What is your name?' and 'Where do you live?', you know, in case I want to get the info from some Punjabi person I'm going to stalk. So why is Akshay getting a degree? Um, because he made 4 hit movies last year? Why do universities give out doctorates to actors and actresses? Is it so they can write 'Akshay Kumar received a degree from this university'? Is that it, cheap publicity? Aw man, then what am I even doing going to university? I should just make a few movies and they'll be chucking them at me. And Akki even gets to be called Doctor Akshay Kumar should he feel like using the title. Though I think he prefers the title of "His grand movie machine Akshay Kumar". Akki is receiving a honorary Doctorate from the University of Windsor in Ontario...that's in Canada people! Ok, I had to get the atlas to find out where it was but I expect better geography from the rest of you. Other Bollywood stars who have also received 'fake' degrees are Amitabh Bachchan and Shilpa Shetty.

The Zee Cine Awards took place this Saturday in London. Let's look at the winners while I rant about Shahid Kapoor not winning best actor. To make myself feel better, I put the video of "Mauja hi Mauja" up.

Best Film Chak De! India - Aditya Chopra, Yash Raj Films

Yeah, Ok, this deserved the award. Was a whole new genre for Indian cinema, and for once, they actually pulled it off.

Best Director Aamir Khan - Taare Zameen Par

Same idea as above. A new genre done well.

Best Actor (Male) Shah Rukh Khan - Chak De! India

Not fair, not fair, not fair! For the first time Shahid Kapoor was nominated for best actor (I think), Shah Rukh had to play a role that wasn't his usual masala hero. Only consolation is that he got just as big a cheer as SRK at the awards.

Best Actor (Female) Kareena Kapoor - Jab We Met

During her acceptance speech, girls were chanting Shahid's name. Not hard to tell who the real star is.

Most Popular Track Of The Year Mauja Hi Mauja - Jab We Met

Obviously, good choice.

Best Actor In A Supporting Role (Male) Govinda - Partner

What a crap decision! Govinda was the most annoying actor ever in that movie.

Best Actor In A Supporting Role (Female) Shilpa Shetty - Life In A.. Metro

No comment

Best Actor In A Comic Role (Male/Female) Vinay Pathak - Bheja Fry Best Actor In A Negative Role (Male/Female) Arjun Rampal - Om Shanti Om

Okie, Arjun was pretty evil.

Best Playback Singer (Male) Shaan - Jab Se Tere Naina (Saawariya) Best Playback Singer (Female) Shreya Ghosal - Barso Re Megha (Guru) Best Lyrics Prasoon Joshi - Maa (Taare Zameen Par) Best Music A R Rahman - Guru Most Promising Debut Director Aamir Khan - Taare Zameen Par Most Promising Debut (Male) Ranbir Kapoor - Saawariya Most Promising Debut (Female) Deepika Padukone - Om Shanti Om Most Promising Debut (Child Artiste) Darsheel Safary - Taare Zameen Par

The rest are really obvious awards. Have a good evening all.

Aaah, cappuccino, now I feel more awake. Well, slightly more awake. At least I stopped dozing and drooling on the keyboard. Shilpa Shetty was recently in Miami to shoot a "special" song with Abhishek Bachchan and John Abraham. Is 'special song' the new phrase for 'item song' to placate all those 'classy' actresses who do them. "No, no, you're not an item girl, you're a special girl!" Sounds like something Barney would say. The new film by Karan Johar, Dostana, is now filming with Priyanka Chopra as the leading lady. I can't really find a synopsis of the movie but I know it's a comedy and it involves friendships. How shockingly original. The bigger story here is that Aishwarya Rai-Bachchan was cast as the leading lady but pulled out because she was unwilling to have two male co-stars competing for her affections, especially since her affections all belong to her husband. Aww, how sweet -puke-

"Now that Abhishek and I are married the kind of quirky situations shown in Dostana, albeit in a comic vein, wouldn't have worked," "Karan Johar wasn't bothered with all these personal considerations. But I felt otherwise. I thought the audience would wonder, 'She likes John and Abhishek equally? No way!',"

Well, since the movie is set in a world where Abhishek has the same hotness ranking as John, anything can happen. Update: Dostana is the remake of I now Pronounce you Chuck and Larry.

I'm saying this in the hope that she comes to this website and tries to sue me. Wouldn't that be so cool? Ok people, here's the deal for today...I'm very very tired (6 hour shopping sprees really take it out of a girl), so there will be no analysis, no sarcasm and no jokes...pretty much like every day actually. Shilpa Shetty has been going out with boyfriend Raj Kundra for a while, but either she's very paranoid or she hates the idea of getting too close to the guy because she's threatened to sue the website that started a rumour that she could be getting married. Soon SoggyCornflakes will be big enough to start rumours too but until then, I'll report on others. Rediff.com started the rumour that she had married Raj because the couple were captured going into a temple, with her family. Her publicist says,

"Shilpa is flabbergasted with such irresponsible journalism, Shilpa may file for defamation if prompt action is not taken by the website"

Don't let them win Rediff! Stick to your guns...when a person becomes a celebrity, they automatically come into the public eye and speculation is a part of celebdom, get over it.

Or something more witty. A few months ago, the story of public indecency involved Richard Gere and Shilpa Shetty, this year, the story involves Neha Dhupia and another rich, white man. At Channel [V]'s live Bollywood Premiere, Neha was dancing up a storm with Richard Branson on stage. You know who he is, right guys? The role model for all high-school dropouts? That guy who's company name makes you want to giggle because you think of something else? Yeah, that's him. Now dancing isn't frowned upon, but the few pecks that Neha got from Richard and the little flashes that the photographers got when he twirled her around were serious no-no's. No criminal proceedings have been started...yet, but Neha is alright with the whole debacle.

"I have taken the whole incident in the right spirit and I don't think there was any harm caused to anyone. I would like to dance with him once again, but this time I will make sure that I am wearing trousers."

Some bloggers and websites insist that this is a show of disrespect to Indian women by the White guys. Indians...tut, tut, always playing the race card. Kidding, I wouldn't wanna offend my readers, some of you are really mean. But to suggest that these guys would not behave the same way with Hollywood actresses is a bit stupid. They would, but Hollywood actresses wouldn't be wearing these tacky short clothes that C-list actresses seem to prefer and thus, the option of flashing doesn't even open up. Ohkay, and I think that's enough deep thought and analysis for today. After all, it's Friday!