SoggyCornflakes - Bollywood

For at least 6 months, when his his next hearing occurs. It was unlikely that they would keep a Bollywood star in jail for so long and Sanjay’s stardom (and good behaviour) made sure that he didn’t spend too much longer in the can.

The Supreme court has granted him bail based on his good conduct and the fact that in the last 10 years he’s been out on bail, he’s never broken the law. Wow…

Unfortunately Sanjay is still in jail until the legal formalities are complete, but he’ll be out in a day or two, where his family is waiting for him with home-cooked food and his own bed. Cheapskates, they could at least buy him some KFC or something. He’s been surviving on daal and rice for the last month. I’m assuming that’s the kinda food you get in jail.

And Bollywood will be so glad, since he’s back to finish their movies. What a loving reception he’ll get from the.

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Ever since Lage Raho Munnabhai, interest in Mahatma Ghandi and Ghandigiri (I hope I got that word right) has increased and Sanjay Dutt will be honoured for his contribution to the cause.

At his Pune jail cell, Sanjay will be credited by three officials from the Ghandi Vichar Andolan organisation, which states the even though Sanjay is in jail, it’s for a different matter and his contribution to the cause is much more important.

“We have taken note of the fact that what the entire nation could not do in independent India has been achieved by Sanjay Dutt through his role as Munna Bhai.

“The extent to which the message of Mahatma Gandhi could be spread through the film was incredible. I am really impressed by the overwhelming impact the film made on the minds of common people.”

As far as we are concerned, we see enough reason to felicitate the man who deserves praise for effectively spreading the message of the father of the nation.”

“Sanjay has done something that books, visuals, and other laudable efforts could not achieve over the decades.”

Well, even though Sanjay was the ’star’ that made people pay attention, shouldn’t the writers of the movie get some credit too? After all, they came up with the ideas.

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It doesn’t seem so likely, as his bail hearing has been postponed, yet again.

Sanjay Dutt’s been sentenced to 6 years for the illegal possession of weapons relating to the 1993 Mumbai Bomb Blasts. While it took ages for the case to finally make it to court, now they’re making sure that he stays in jail for a good few years.

Sanjay’s next chance to appeal his sentence is set for the 27th of November. Even though he had already spent 16 months in jail, I don’t know if that counts in the 6 years.

But I still think that Sanjay will eventually be let out of jail, just because he’s one of the biggest stars of Bollywood. They couldn’t keep Paris Hilton in jail for more than 23 days and look at what a mess she is. No comparison, Sanjay will be getting out soon, even if he has to spend the rest of his life out on bail. And then he can go back to making lots of money for lots of different film directors…charming.

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Even though Vidya Balan played a glamourous and modern girl in Heyy Babyy, she knows that people like her good wholesome Indian girl image and she wants to keep it like that.

“That’s my USP and why should I shy away from it? Even if I tried to be a floozy, I’d be a disaster. Even when I played a radio-jockey in Raj Kumar Hirani’s film, I wore kurtas, skirts and other desi accessories. I’m not like a hip radio-jockey from Australia,”

And though some people think she’s arrogant, she’s delighted by the attention that she gets, though it took a meeting with Amitabh Bachchan on the sets of Eklavya to make her blush.

“Amitji and I didn’t have too many scenes together in ‘Eklavya’. In fact, we had just three scenes. But we watched the edit together. When he came in, he said, ‘Namaste’. Then he held my hand and said I was exceptional. I started giggling. He said, ‘All of us are in love with you.’ I didn’t know what to say,”

“I feel extremely blessed. Amitji appreciating me is such a compliment. It makes my parents so proud. I’ve learnt how important it is to be generous to the people around you. I saw the same kind of humility and generosity in Sanjay Dutt during ‘Parineeta’, ‘Lage Raho Munna Bhai’ and ‘Eklavya’.”

Nice to see that at least some stars are humble…I’m talking about you-know-who…if I write his name, I know he’ll burst in hear singing about his greatness…you know, that guy that kinda had a hit movie on Diwali…yeah, that guy.

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I wonder why that could be? Could it be because of the fact that you have no privacy, the food sucks or the thought that you’ll have to deal with it for the next 6 years? It’s no wonder that Sanjay Dutt is going into depression. I know about these things, since I’m studying psychology. When you cry and cry, that’s depression. When you smile and laugh and love the world, it’s either drugs, a sugar high or love. When you eat face cream…yeah, that’s not normal. Get some help.

So anyways, Sanjay did not enjoy his first day back at jail. He was nervous the whole day, couldn’t sleep and refused breakfast. hey, that sounds like my first day at school. Except, you know, they let me out eventually.

Though Sanjay’s lawyers are optimistic and think that Sanjay can and will be granted bail soon.

“Sanjay should have no problem obtaining a bail in the Supreme Court because of three reasons, namely his not been convicted under the Terrorists and Disruptive Activities (Prevention) Act (TADA) act, secondly his being on bail for more that 10 years and thirdly his good conduct when on bail.”

But until Sanjay gets out, he can start concentrating on carpentry again. He reportedly liked attacking pieces of wood with a knife before. Disturbing what it could mean, if you’re Freudian…excpet I’m not, so Sanjay is just doing carpentry.

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C’mon Sanjay fans, I hope you are all weeping into your keyboards. Yes, I’m cruel. I laugh at old men who’ll be spending the next 6 years in jail. But this is a learning experience…Sanjay learned not to deal with arms anymore. A harsh lesson, but hey, Kudos to the Indian government for actually punishing him for breaking the law, because all other stars usually get away with it.

Sanjay Dutt has been avoiding jail for a while, because he hasn’t seen the copy of the judgement against him, just a little technicality that has kept him out of jail since August, but now that he’s seen it, he’s probably going back to jail today. That really is sad, but couldn’t he just squeeze his eyes shut and refuse to look?

Oh well, poor guy, he’ll get a lot of time to read that judgement (4340 pages) in jail. Why would anyone write such a long judgement? That’s more than all the Harry Potter books combined! Oh well, be good Sanjay and maybe they’ll let you out soon.

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Well, at least for a month. There was some technical delay in his court hearings or something and so Sanjay Dutt is a free man, until mid-October.

So while some actors will complain about the ineptitude and delays in Indian bureaucracy, I’m sure Sanjay will be thanking his lucky stars, because this might be his last month free before he goes on to serve a few years in jail. Ag man, who am I kidding? Sanjay Dutt will never go to jail for too long because he’s a ’star’ and no matter how much people stress this, those guys are actually above the law.

Sanjay will also be hoping for some more bureaucratic bungles, making his expected return to jail further away. And since the whole of India are on his side…yippee for him.

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Sanjay Dutt is out of jail (obviously), because how could they keep an actor of his caliber in jail? I guess the same way they’re keeping Salman Khan in jail, but that’s a different story, which I’m hoping ‘The Other Guy’ will be dealing with. I’m so tired of celebrities going to jail. It’s like a hobby for them.

Speaking of hobbies, Sanjay didn’t have much to do in jail besides catch up with his correspondence, and he had to use actual pen and paper (gasp!) No printers, no keyboards, no emails…how very primitive.

Says a lose source of Sanjay’s:

“In jail the easiest and most reliable means of communication is the Indian postal service. Some of us who are his close friends who wanted him to know we’re with him during his solitude, sent letters by Speed Post which were duly and prompted delivered to him.”

I guess they don’t have FaceBook in jail huh? Oh well, snail mail works too.

Sanju’s not really enjoying himself though, because even though he’s free, he could be going back any day. I guess it does weigh on your conscious that this could be your last meal as a free man…your last drink…your last cigarette…your last hooker…ummm, I think you get my point.

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Whoo-freaking-hoo! Let’s all celebrate…khushiya manoa!…let’s have a party. Ok, whatever! But for all Sanjay Dutt fans, you’ll be happy to hear that the man is out of jail, at least for a little while. I think they might let him out to complete some movies before they throw him back in to rot.

The Supreme Court granted him interim bail on Monday but this is only a temporary relief.

He will be back behind bars once he gets the order of the judgement delievered by the TADA Court that could be as early as next month but for the moment his family and fans are celebrating.

It has been more than 20 days after he was sentenced to six years in jail by the TADA Court.

Does that mean more Munnabhai? No? Just gangster roles? Then throw him back in jail! No Munnabhai, no freedom!

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(For a little while at least)

Sanjay Dutt, has been granted bail by the Indian Supreme Court after he had been sentenced to six years in jail for receiving guns from gangsters involved in the country’s worst bombings.

Dutt’s lawyers say the actor will be released tomorrow (Tuesday) saying,

“There is a lot of paperwork involved. He is expected to be released tomorrow,”

Dutt’s lawyers are now apparently seeking punishment for Dutt rather than jail time. While in jail, Dutt was understood to have undertaken carpentry as prison labour and was paid about half a dollar a day. He ate the frugal jail meals and shared a toilet.

…

You see! Indians know what jail is all about! Not the schmoopsie crap that Paris Hilton had.

I wouldn’t be surprised if Dutt isn’t a virgin anymore… You know what I mean! He has a kid, so unless she’s Jesus reborn… Dutt’s not a virgin. Did I mention I have a really short concentration span?

Wait… what did you think I meant?

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