SoggyCornflakes - Bollywood

Happy Monday all and I'm updating late...again.

When most people, especially guys, talk about Rani Mukherjee, they usually talk about how pretty or feminine she is. Or in guy talk "I would hit that". I wonder how they'll react when they see Rani with a mustache.

No, she didn't forget to go to a parlour and thread her upper lip! She'll be seen with a mustache for her role in Aditya Chopra's next film. Apparently she'll be playing a Mulan type character...of a girl that wants to enter a man's world and will do it through any means.

Except Rani is not saving the life of her ailing father in the movie, she's actually just a girl who wants to play cricket so badly that she'll dress up like a man to become part of a men's cricket team. Honestly, that sounds kinda cool.

And obviously, there has to be some gender confusion when one of her team mates starts falling for her but he'll be seriously disturbed because she's a dude but in the end of the movie when he finds out she's a girl, he'll be relieved beyond measure. I'm not sure if that final bit will be in the movie, but it's kinda expected from gender-confused movies.

While most of us are content to laugh at the flailing careers of some of the actors and actresses in Bollywood, people like Aditya Chopra are really good samaritans, wishing to make the people around them a success.

Amisha Patel got to see Aditya Chopra as she was working for Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic under the Yash Raj banner and he's committed herself to get her career back on track. He signed her up for other Yash Raj productions and has forced the actress to pull out of Billoo Barber starring Shah Rukh Khan, where she played the wife of Irrfan Khan's character.

Even though Amisha's role in the movie was small, she took it because she'd get to have a few scenes with Kind Khan. Aditya was having none of that and made her pull out because according to him, she could only be a successful actress if she stopped taking small and inconsequential roles like her role in Bhool Bhulaiya. Amisha is flattered by Aditya's attention obviously, though Rani might have a few reasons to be concerned.

As for the role that Amisha gave up, that went to Lara Dutta.

Happy Monday all! Sorry for the late update, just been kinda busy today. But I have good news and bad news. The good news is that I'm taking over SoggyCornflakes - Celebrities almost entirely, again. So that blog will be regular again, if you like reading celebrity gossip that doesn't involve Bollywood. The bad news is that because of that, SoggyCornflakes - Bollywood is going to suffer a bit and I'll be posting less. Not that much less though, so it's not that bad. I hope you like the new look blog and I'm hoping to keep it this way for a while (until I get bored again) but I like it a lot, even though the pictures aren't that big anymore.So onwards to Bollywood. The rumours about Aditya Chopra and Rani Mukherjee had died down for a while, but now they're back, after Aditya very stupidly gave Rani a big diamond ring, to congratulate her on Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic, which he got a first peek at. I mean, it would have made more sense and been more subtle if he had given some gifts to Saif Ali Khan and Kunal Kohli as well, but since Rani was the only one with a glittering rock on her finger, something is going on again. I know it's a shocking development...I would never have expected it from them -Roll eyes-.

Any regular SoggyCornflakes reader knows that I despise Sherlyn Chopra. I know despise is a strong word, but when you shudder at her pictures and cringe when you read about her, despise seems like a pretty good word. Sherlyn recently gave an interview and I think I understand her behaviour now...it's obvious that she's living in her own protected bubble of ignorance and she's quite blissful in there. Sherlyn says that she's changing her image in Bollywood...except not that much.

"I don’t want any more of what I was doing till now. I want more class. I was the ugly duckling but now, I want things to get better. But this won’t be a bikini to bindi makeover,”

She doesn't seem to get it, does she? The ugly stepsister never turns into Cinderella. More disturbing stuff follows,

“I have bagged a 40-minute role in Yash Raj’s next film with Rani Mukerji and Shahid Kapur. It is not a cameo and I share a beautiful relationship with Shahid on screen. The director of the film, Anurag Singh, had seen my video Outrageous and the numerous wallpapers online. He told me that I’d need to glam it up in the film. I told him that I’ve done it all, only to be told that maybe, I have no idea what super-glam is. They are apparently in talks with Manish Malhotra for a makeover,”

You have got to be kidding me. This shows the continued decline of Yash Raj if they have to resort to hiring Sherlyn. Though it's going to take a lot from them to teach her that "glam" is not synonymous with "ho". When asked if she had met with Yash Chopra, she replied,

“No, I haven’t, but I have had a brief encounter with Adi. I told him about many things, including my trip to Barcelona, and he just said, ‘Hmm, okay’ to most of the things,”

Probably because Aditya Chopra was thinking "Dear God, I used to work with Shah Rukh Khan and Amitabh Bachchan...do you hate me so much now!? Why God, why?!?!"

“But I can’t wait to work on the film. Anurag told me that Rani and Shahid are amazing actors and if I want to get my act right, I better start attending the film workshops. We’ll be shooting from July and I can’t wait to meet Rani! I’ll probably call her Ranidi and the first thing I’m going to tell her is that I loved her in Black. Maybe, she’ll ask me to call her just Rani and not di!”

Is it just me or is this starting to sound like the diary entry of a sad little teenager? Ooh, maybe Shahid will even look at her! -EEEEEE!- And the icing on this cake, she speaks about her new video and compared herself to Hema Malini,

“The video is called Dard-E-Sherlyn and it has some similarity to Dard kehta hai... I loved Hemaji in Sholay and this is my tribute to her. This might make me the dream girl of the twenty-first century!”

See, I told you she lives in her own little world. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go throw up...and brush my teeth...and wash my hands...and maybe stab myself in the eyes because I've read way too much about Sherlyn. Ewww...

Weirdly enough, Sonam Kapoor is one of the few actresses that is happy that she wasn't cast opposite Shah Rukh Khan for his next movie. Rab De Bana Di Jodi (God made this relationship) is Yash Raj's next attempt at getting a hit and after realising that Kareena and Saif aren't going to bring in the money, Aditya Chopra has moved back to tried and tested Shah Rukh. Sonam says that the role was never offered to her to begin with,

"Since the film was announced speculation started about me being in the project. Arrey baba, I was never offered the film! I don't know where this whole thing started, honestly. I did visit Adi a couple of times like any other actor. But not for any particular role. Maybe people saw me entering Yashraj. Nowadays even if an actress passes by Yashraj she's rumoured to have signed a film with them." "I had never even approached Adi for this role and I had a reason for it.I know it required someone very Punjabi and young. I've just played a full-on Punjabi kudi, salwar-kameez sharara-gharara and all, in Rakeysh Mehra's Dilli 6. Even in Saawariya I was in full elaborate Indian clothes. Now I need change of pace..and grace."

Even though Sonam is looking for a more modern role, she is not into skimpy outfits...after all, her father Anil Kapoor is her adviser and it's understandable that he wouldn't want his teenage daughter parading around like that. Sonam is worried about honour too, after she reportedly turned down a Rakesh Roshan project because it asked for a bit too much skin.

"All I'll say is, I'd never do anything to compromise myself or my family, or any film where I've to cringe at the premiere."

Wow, honestly, I admire her resolve.

Today I'm feeling ultra-tired so two posts to start off your weekend and that's it. Then go check your email or write on your blog or surf some porn, whatever you do when you're online not reading SoggyCornflakes. The lucky couple is Saif Ali Khan and Kareena Kapoor. Whoohoo! Someone throw a party! No seriously, I'll go anywhere for free food. Kareena "big-mouth" Kapoor says she and Saif just can't wait to get married.

“Yes, I am going to get married very soon. Initially, Saif and I thought of giving our relationship some time before we get married. But now I don’t think either of us can wait any longer. So may be, post the release of Tashan this month, you all can see us wedded,”

So is this a continuation of Aditya Chopra's rule "Talk about anything besides Tashan"? Oh well, Bebo really did it now. I'm not exactly sure what IT is but IT ain't good.

More Kareena news, unfortunately. Kareena Kapoor was told in no uncertain terms by director/producer Aditya Chopra to keep quiet about Tashan, her new movie with Saif Ali Khan. We know Kareena has a big mouth, but because her relationship with Saif is a bit dodgy (by the way, this post was an April Fools joke, for those who believe all the crap I write), wouldn't it be nice if she could just conveniently change the topic to her new movie if any journalist asks any uncomfortable questions? Aditya realizes that, I think, and so tells Kareena to keep mum about the movie. Also, there was a lot of fuss that Bebo would be appearing in a bikini. Guess what? Just a rumour to drum up publicity. Boys, you've been saved.

While things are looking good for Hrithik Roshan, his daddy might be paying for a bit of rudeness and pride that's now catching up with him. Right, let's start this story from the beginning, under the guise that I'm trying to explain something to you but it's actually an opportunity for me to collect my thoughts. Hrithik's relationship with his father Rakesh Roshan is a bit strained at the moment, as Rakesh is actually kind of controlling and Hrithik doesn't know how to remove himself from the situation, therefore preferring to sulk quietly. The problem began after Dhoom 2, when Papa Rakesh decided that Hrithik would not act in a movie, unless it was co-produced by FilmKraft productions (Rakesh's own production house). This led to Hrithik losing out on many roles and his father negotiating deals without Hrithik's consent. The last straw came when Rakesh rejected Aditya Chopra when he offered Hrithik a role in his upcoming movie. Hrithik remained the obedient son and accepted the decision, though feeling bad enough that since then, he's been ignoring his father as much as possible. On the other hand, is it that surprising that Rakesh was dissed by Aditya when he wanted to book Yash Raj studios to film a Krazzy 4 song for Hrithik. Aditya refused point blank, not even bothering to make up some excuse and Rakesh stormed out, to book at some other studio and vows to exact revenge by building his own studio. My form of revenge would involve C4 and a rocket launcher. Learn from the best Rakesh!

But that isn't the question. The question is why do I keep writing about these crap rumours involving Rani Mukherjee and Aditya Chopra? This is the last time I write this...the next blog post involving them will be when they actually get married, which will probably be never. Stuff that get's so hyped up never actually has much truth in it. But whatever...the facts are that Aditya Chopra's divorce in finally final...in May. The dubious rumours are is that he can't wait to tie the knot with Rani. His parents hate him for divoring his wife and he moved out because of their displeasure. Rani's parents don't like it that she's "supposed" to get married to Aditya either. That pretty much shows us how much actual truth there are in these articles. It's like me saying I'm a girl...then we can all suppose that I'm an emotional psychopath at certain times of the month and that I make $1000 dollars every month from SoggyCornflakes and that I have a pet hamster called Sniffy who does tricks. See? Doesn't make much sense.

But she doesn't want to! Madhuri Dixit, who currently lives in the US, is coming back to Mumbai to promote her new movie Aaja Nachle, but it took a lot of convincing to get her there because she didn't really want to have much to do with the movie. Now you know there's something wrong with a movie if the lead actress decides that she doesn't like it. Supposedly Madhuri wasn't happy with how the movie turned out and it took a lot of convincing by Yash Chopra to make her haul herself back to India to promote the movie. Madhuri is making a comeback after 5 years, last being seen in Devdas with Shah Rukh Khan. Maybe I'm a bit biased, but I've always liked the movies directed or produced by Aditya Chopra, so I don't think it can be all that bad. Let's wait...it's coming out on the 30th of this month.