Shilpa Shetty, the C (Maybe B) list Bollywood star who shot to fame after her stint on Celebrity Big Brother, is currently in London to promote… umm… India (Shocking).

Shilpa says,

“Cultural respect and encouraging a deeper understanding of Indian traditions through a celebration of diversity, art, dance and food is obviously an issue close to my heart, which is why I am delighted to be a part of these events.”

Quite so. However when asked to talk at length regarding the Indian traditions that she’s apparently fond of, journalists were told that they would have to pay for the interview. And pay through their asses at that, with her asking price close to 20 000 Pounds.

So people are expected to pay 20 000 Pounds to speak to a C (Maybe B) List Bollywood actress? And it’s not like we don’t know what she’s going to say…

SoggyCornflakes exclusive Shilpa Shetty interview:

SC- Hi Shilpa!
SS- Hi SoggyCornflakes.
SC- So, tell us about your racism incident.
SS- I don’t really think there was any racism.
SC- But you cried, and you said “is it coz I is Indian?”
SS- It was a misunderstanding.
SC- Miss Shetty the camera doesn’t lie… So you believe that Jade Goody and co. aren’t racist?
SS- No, just misunderstood.
SC- We hear, you stole a womens husband recently. Is this a tactic to catch up with fellow B Grader Sushmita Sen.
SS- I did no such thing. It’s a purely professional relationship. Although I feel terrible for his estranged wife.
SC- You said it’s a professional relationship…So… you’re a hooker now?
SS- No, but I feel sorry for the plight of prostitutes all over the world.
SC- Well maybe you can give them some of the money you earn from these interviews.
SS- No, I’d rather not. I am a saver (read: miser). But I will support their cause.
SC- How?
SS- By smiling and waving at premieres. Also every second word I speak will be hooker.
SC- OK, than… Thanks for your time
SS- No Hooker Problem. Hooker bye!

See? And I got it for free man! She’s so predictable! It’s like speaking to a computer! Unless (shock) Shilpa Shetty’s a fembot!