SoggyCornflakes - Bollywood

Govinda is quite a happy chappie now. His latest film is a hit, even though he didn't take any money for it, he's finally paid off his debts and directors are crowded outside his door again. Ok, well maybe not crowded, I'm sure they're in an orderly queue.

"Life is finally on an even level. Partner is such a hit. It crossed 50-55 crores in the first week. David Dhawan has changed himself through the decades. He did a very wise thing by changing his cinema with the times. This month I too will be out of my debts. I'll finally pay off all the debts I owed after the failure of my home production Sukh. Partner proved to be lucky for me personally and professionally. Not only did I get a big hit I also found a friend in Salman and his family." "But I gained so much more from this film and my association with the Khans! And now that Partner is a hit I'm getting better and better films, so the money is coming. I've signed new films with David and Ravi Chopra. There's a queue of producers again. Now I'm going to be very careful."

I'm happy for him...I'm happy for me too. Not that I'm out of debt, but things are pretty rosy. Won't last forever I know, but might as well enjoy it while it's happening. Yippee!!! Sorry, I had to do that.

Wanted: Ugly man with filthy mind, willing to send lewd sms's to advance actresses careers. Multiple sim cards needed. Will be paid on commission. No fans and stalkers please. I think this was what Mehraj Rehman replied to, as the small-time gangster is now in jail for harassing actresses with sms's. He claims that he didn't do it on his own accord though, but was paid by certain actresses to taunt and trouble them, because they could make use of the publicity.

“Sab ko publicity chahiye aur mujhe un logo ne Bollywood ka don bana diya,” (Everyone wants publicity and they made me the Don of Bollywood) “I have proof that actresses like Kangana Ranaut, Sambhvana Seth and Koena Mitra paid me huge amounts to issue threats to them and their foes for cheap publicity." “The police have not nabbed me. I surrendered as Nagmaji had lodged an FIR against me. I don’t want to hurt her feelings as I respect her a lot.”

If you respected her so much, wouldn't it have been better if you hadn't stalked her in the first place? Wow, criminals are stupid...and Shah Rukh made a cooler and less dumb don.

Katrina Kaif is still working her way around Bollwood, but she's getting it right. The young actress has alot of hits to her name, so I guess he's through the phase where she wants to get noticed. Everyone knows the name of Katrina Kaif. Katrina was recently at an opening of a jewellery shop, where she was decked out in gold and a sari. The actress kept the interview light and non-controversial, even not being baited when asked who her favourite co-star was. Nope, it wasn't Salman, but Akshay Kumar. Katrina did keep her answer low-key and matter-of-fact, so hopefully no-one will be starting any rumours. Or maybe I should start a rumour? Hmmm, that might be fun. Katrina likes being a commercial actress, even if it is fluff roles, because at least she can fill a cinema.

“Like everyone else, even I want to be taken note of,” “Every actress thinks differently, but for me, it is more important to be an entertainer. I am consciously building my career as a commercial actress. At a later stage, I might do offbeat roles. But now I don’t want to do films that ten people watch. I want to do movies where the hall is full. I want to do ‘fun cinema’. Eventually of course, I want to try other kinds of roles too,”

I think most people prefer you the way you are Kat.

See, my Hindi isn't that bad. Actor Sanjay Dutt is going to jail (maybe he's already gone) and this isn't any Paris Hilton overnighter either. The star was sentenced to 6 years by the courts for receiving weapons...six years for a rifle and a pistol? Damn, at least it should have been an AK-47 and a nuclear bomb.

"It was an eminently dangerous act," judge Pramod Kode said. "With the punishment of a minimum of five years and maximum of 10 years it can in no way be a minor offence or of a less grave nature."

Sanjay almost started crying when the verdict was handed down and asked permission to call his daughter...possibly asking for cigarettes...because you know, he's gonna want some bargaining chip when he goes back to jail. Everyone needs protection. Nah, that's mean of me. Sanjay is like my dad's age...except my dad doesn't specialize is gangster roles. I think he rather enjoys cutting people up instead. Oh well Sanja, see you in 6 years...maybe 4 if you're good. DOn't worry, jail isn't that bad. Just keep your back against the wall at all times!

Shilpa Shetty just keeps getting more famous and has reportedly been offered the role of the next Bond girl, to star opposite Daniel Craig in the next James Bond movie. There's just one problem...no-one is sure that she was actually offered the role...and if she was, would she do what is required of a Bond girl. A few years ago, when Aishwarya was top of Bollywood actresses, she was offered the role too, but who wants to see a Bond girl on screen who won't kiss, cuddle or otherwise show any form of steamy affection? And somehow, i doubt Shilpa would resort to those kinds of scenes either. People website in the UK conducted a poll over whether Shilpa would make a good Bond girl and she won, beating out Halle Berry even. Some people are quite critical of the beauty, saying that she looks too fake to play the 'naturally' beautiful Bond girls. Maybe Shilpa will start opening up Hollywood mainstream cinema for Indian women, since Ash couldn't do the job. Maybe if Shilpa whores it up a bit, she can do it. Yay, go Shilpa!

There has been constant debate around the ages of Bollywood actresses, over the past couple of years. Most of the debate seemed to center around Mallika Sherawat. However it seems she's not the only one with something to hide. SantaBanta reports

This big question and controversy about Madame M’s real age just refuses to die down. There have always been contrary reports of her age in the media. At times she is 26-28 and at times 35-36. After almost succeeding in hiding her marriage, now it seems Mallika is hell bent on putting her real age under wraps. Mallika is the front runner here, but she is not exactly alone. Bipasha Basu has convinced everyone that she is 28, while a school junior of hers from Bhartiya Vidya Bhavan, Kolkata who is herself actually around that age says, “Bipasha was my senior in school and at least three years older than me. I don’t know how she suddenly cut down so many years”. That makes dear old Bips almost 31! Wannabe sex kitten and queen of sleazy cinema Sheryln Chopra claims to be only 22, where as sources claim otherwise. ‘Sherlyn has been 22 for many years now”, jokes a source.

I guess when you're young you're treated differently. When your under 30 and dancing around semi-nude you're hot. But when you're 30 plus, you become a desperate whore... And seeing that two of the above have no talent to speak of (I'm still undecided about Bipasha), their only oute to fame was the "hottie" factor. These budday have it tough!

Soha Ali Khan, daughter of the Nawab of Pataudi and Sharmila Tagore, says that her parents didn't want her to become an actress and are (seemingly) still a bit miffed at her choice of career. She says,

"I was consciously shielded from cinema. I did not even see many Indian movies, My parents did not see me as an actor and I knew if I joined Bollywood, I would make them unhappy. "I studied in London and moved to Mumbai where I started working in a bank but I had the desire to act and I got seduced by Bollywood."

When asked about her mums reaction to her career choice she says,

"She does give me some tips occasionally but she has hardly praised me for my acting."

Well... Soha, to be perfectly honest with you, when you act in classics like Dil Maange More and Shaadi No. 1 , you shouldn't really be looking for praise. Rather you should be glad that no one pelted you with rotten tomatoes before hanging you up by your legs and kicking you in the face over and over and over and over and over again. NOTE: Yes, I know she acted in Rang De Basanti... but I choose to ignore that. It's called selective journalism people. It's also called being a manipulative, jealous, bitter c*nt. Same same.

Awwwww, by now you can tell that I'm a fan of Priyanka Chopra and she's quite cool. The actress is finally getting her life in order, by decorating her new home; two connected flats, one for her and one for her parents because she can't imagine living without them. Seriously, how cute is that? How many people out there will actually admit that they love their parents, never mind ask them to live right next door to you. Priyanka is having her flat decorated by Suzanne Khan and it's working out just how she envisioned it;

"And now it's now or never...It will be ready during Diwali. It will be two connecting flats, just like it was earlier on. My family would be staying in one flat while I'd be staying in the other. They've always given me my privacy. I'd never be comfortable without my parents by my side." "It's the first time I'm moving into a new place ever since I moved into Bombay. And so far I've had no opportunity to do up my place the way I always wanted to. If you come to my house at the moment you'll see it's very functional." "Having a friend to do the interiors helps a lot. Susanne and I are doing it up the way I had always visualized my home. My parents will be just a door away. I always want my life to be this way. With my family at a place where I can reach out and touch them."

How sweet

A poll conducted by some half-ass magazine declared Celina Jaitley as the sexiest actress in Bollywood. Except replace 'sexiest' with 'skankiest' and 'actress' with 'will take her clothes off for money'. Well, that's how I see her. really. Celina knows why she was first though:

"Yes, I did receive a lot of messages and I take the win as a compliment. My sex appeal lies in my face. It's also a lot about the right attitude."

You don't say...

This is for all Priyanka Chopra fans, who really want to know every minute detail of the actresses life.

Gizmo "My brother Siddharth helps me with all of my gizmos. I am really attached to my Apple lap-top. I am always on it It is the best mode of communication for me. My photos, my music – it has plenty of my data," she reveals. Accessory "My Tag Heuer watch. This Link diamond model", says the brand ambassador pointing to her sleek chronometer. Cosmetic "Once thing I will not go out without is my mascara. It defines yours eyes and adds meaning to your expressions," she analyses. Outfits "My all – time favorite is a pair of jeans topped by a crisp, white shirt. But when I am playing it safe I go for a black shirt." says the erstwhile beauty queen. Hotspots "Most definitely my home. I am hardly there, you know," surmises the globe- trotting actor.

There, now you know. I hope you're happy